2014-12-10 / Editorial

WHY?

Don Lively

I was drinking my morning cup of coffee which, realistically, is more like four cups since it requires a large mug to do what my morning coffee has to do.

And, as usual, it tasted like crap.

I drink coffee every morning.

I don’t like coffee.

I was convinced a couple of years ago that drinking coffee in the morning would give me a boost, a wake up, a little shot of energy to get my day started. And, I have to grudgingly admit, it works. Since I started partaking I have noticed that I don’t feel as drowsy and tired halfway through the day.

But the fact remains, I don’t like coffee.

But why I drink something that, to my taste buds, tastes like primordial mud is not the question that I asked myself that recent morning as I choked down the Maxwell House Breakfast Blend.

I knew why I was drinking it.

For the kick start.

The question was, why was I making it taste even worse by adding a fake sweetener that does exactly the opposite of what it’s supposed to do?

I’ve tried them all and exactly none of them does anything more than make my coffee taste more bitter than it al- ready is.

Why indeed, when I have a perfectly good bag of sugar sitting right there on the shelf next to the Splenda.

Why? To save 40 calories.

40.

Forty.

That’s how much sugar it requires to make my morning coffee fit to consume.

Is drinking something that tastes so bad worth 40 measly calories?

I find myself asking similar questions a lot these days.

I picked up a novel at Wal- Mart. It was in the bargain bin section which should have been my first clue. I’d seen the same book at Barnes and Noble and at Books-A-Million and, because I have always liked the author’s other work, I’d debated about buying it. It was hardback and cost more than I wanted to risk until I saw it at Wally World.

I bought it.

It stunk.

I read the first hundred or so pages and never got anywhere near a plot and I had to endure social and political references that I am diametrically opposed to. I read novels for entertainment, not for opinion.

On about page one-hundredand one my sister SherryLou’s words came back to me. She and my cousin Angie Angie, yes, two times, are avid readers and compare notes often and they have come to the conclusion that, at our age, we shouldn’t waste time on bad books.

I couldn’t agree more.

I pitched the book into a dumpster, all $2.69 of Wal- Mart value.

Never looked back.

More whys.

Why do I put up with certain people?

You know the ones I’m talking about.

They drain the very breath out of you just by walking in the room.

Granted, there aren’t many folks whose very presence make me want to commit strangulation but there are a few.

Why tolerate them?

Why let them suck the life out of every situation that they enter?

Why?

Well, cause some of them are kin to me.

God decides who your relatives are, you have no say so in it.

I guess that’s one “ why” that I’ll just have to live with but if somebody isn’t blood related and I nearly get an instant embolism every time I see them coming, again, at my age, what’s the point?

See Sis and Cuz’s advice above.

I’m on a roll.

So, why do I go to church most every Sunday and Wednesday when nobody really makes me go?

Easy.

Cause I like going to church.

If you’re thirty and you have a few kids and a reluctant spouse and you work sixty hours a week you probably won’t agree with me. At this point in your life going to church might seem more like work than like worship.

Hang in there.

When you are my age you will once again love the fellowship of the saints.

Why do I vote a certain way every time there’s an election?

Again, simple.

Because I agree with almost nothing the other side proposes.

Why do I howl at every full moon?

Cause it’s there and it seems like the right thing to do.

Why have I been single for sixteen years?

No clue.

That’s a mystery for the ages.

Now I think I will fix myself a nice cup of coffee.

No Sweet’N Low™ .

If forty calories a day is to be my downfall, so be it.

I’ll have sugar.

Why?

Just because.

Don Lively is a freelance writer and author of the new book, South O’Yonder. He lives in Shell Bluff. Email Livelycolo@aol.com and visit www.DonLively.com.

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